Aint No Party Like A Guide Dog Retirement Party, Because A Guide Dog Retirement Party Is The Only One I’ll Attend.

Darlings! I hope your weekend was stupendous. I woke up this morning with some witty observation on the human condition that I’m sure would have solved all the world’s problems, but then I stared at my ceramic coffee hand grinder for a good four minutes this morning before realizing I was doing so. Needless to say, I have no deep words of wisdom to share with you today.

But there’s still the internet!

This is the only article you need to read today, imho: Toronto newsroom plans retirement party for guide dog. Of course my Mum sent it to me, and of course y’all are going to need a close up of the good good dog’s face.

I saw this mere minutes after I sent out the Reading List on Friday, and I just couldn’t wait till the next one to share: Leaked Records Reveal Tony Robbins Berated Abuse Victims, And Former Followers Accuse Him Of Sexual Advances. Quelle surprise, a self-help charlatan turns out to be a creep. He seems nice (epic eyeroll) And woof, a quote from one of his alleged victims pretty much sums it up, doesn’t it? “It’s part of what he teaches: Go after what you want… and he wants to acquire you as a woman.”

Speaking of treating women like objects, it shouldn’t surprise you that Samantha Bee has the greatest take on the flood of abortion laws, but also the greatest teaching tool: Sex Ed for Senators (video in link has NSFW language.) And this is my new favorite Sam Bee quote of the year: “Bet you didn’t know uteruses were also time travelers, that’s science b!tch!(and yes, I am self-censoring swear words, after I heard that this here Missive was either going to spam OR causing trouble in your work filters. And I am too vain to let those open numbers drop. So exclamation points as letters it is!)

Did you watch the finale of that dragon show last night? Are you irrationally angry for a reason you can’t put your finger on? Well here, let Scientific American tell you why: The Real Reason Fans Hate the Last Season of Game of Thrones: It's not just bad storytelling—it’s because the storytelling style changed from sociological to psychological.

May your skies be clear, your coffee be hot, and your internet amuse you. Oh, and may you all be kind to each other.

Xoxo Amy