Helsinki? More Like WTF Just Happened, ok I'm done...

Well, some foreign relations shit went down in Helsinki yesterday. It was not pretty. And despite the fact that Trump’s staff supposedly didn’t want the toddler-in-chief to engage in a fawning, freewheeling press conference in which the tangerine POTUS shat on America while making bambi eyes at a former-KGB despot, it seems that, as one European official told the Washington Post, “These people don’t control the reality.” NOPE, THEY SURE DO NOT and it seems that everyone in the White House is a wee bit shellshocked today.

Since I don’t have the emotional depth to attempt to wrap all of this up in a neat bow this morning, here’s a wee selection of headlines for ya:

• The New York Times: Trump Sheds All Notions of How a President Should Conduct Himself Abroad

• New York Daily News Editorial Board: Putin's poodle: Trump sells out U.S. intelligence agencies with the world watching <— hey Daily News, that’s an insult to poodles, which are smart, stylish, loyal and majestic creatures.

• The Salt Lake Tribune: Come home, Ambassador Huntsman, your country needs you (Note: Jon Hunstman is the US Ambassador to Russia.)

• CNN: Trump caved spectacularly to Putin. Here's what might happen next

• National Review: Trump’s Helsinki Discord

• The Washington Post: If you work for Trump, quit now

And here’s the money quote, in a statement from Senator John McCain: “No prior president has ever abased himself more abjectly before a tyrant.” HOT DAMN, WALNUTS. That is not only a beautifully written sentence - well done, comms staff, well done - it chills me to my broken soul. Now what are you going to do about it?

But is anything going to change? As this CNN analysis points out, “A normal President might rethink his approach to leadership.” So to answer my own question in my favorite Twitter parlance: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA sob.

The ONLY redeeming thing that happened yesterday was Chris Wallace’s masterful interview of Putin on FOX, where Wallace tried to hand the Russian president a copy of Mueller’s indictments, and asked him why all his friends were dead. Read the NY Mag round up of the most tense moments.

And in other news, Amazon Prime Day had one job. Just. One. Job. But yea, I still ordered stuff yesterday, I’m only an internet human after all.

Woof. See ya tomorrow, folks.