Insta-famous Fish, Gov Site SNAFUs, End-Stage Capitalism Insanity

Happy Hump Day my darlings, a term I hate but at least gives me the excuse to share this GIF with ya:

Instagram is killing fish” because the time it takes to get the perfect trout pout selfie with your catch means your captive fishy is drowning in air for longer. So Weekly Standard columnist Matt Labash, who wants you to understand he is now “crusading PETA moralist,” is here to name and shame, y’all.

Yesterday, on Tax Day, the IRS website was not working. Filers attempting to submit their payments were greeted with a “Planned Outage: April 17 2018 - December 31, 9999” message, which is totally reassuring for those of us living and existing in an internet-dependent timeline. And my favorite bit: Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin referred to the outage as a “high-volume technical issue” and said taxpayers would be able to get an extension.” THANKS BUD.

Oh, also: the Department of Justice’s Amber Alert Website is redirecting users to suuuuuuper hardcore p0rn. And lest we think other gov websites have been spared from this backlinks hat, both and the site for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration are unclean. At least we got this most delighful expert quote in the Gizmodo story: “This is like the 1990s called and wants its vulnerable redirect script back,” said Adriel Desautels, founder of the penetration testing firm Netragard.

Speaking of shitty timelines, submitted by Ben: “Goldman Sachs asks in biotech research report: 'Is curing patients a sustainable business model?’” End-stage capitalism is a trip, friends.

And finally, is eating spicy food a socially-acceptable BDSM practice? Don’t worry friends, Business Insider is ON IT.

Hugs, love, appropriate amounts of infatuation,