If you’re on the east coast, I hope you are home and warm, and that you stayed safe this weekend. If you’re on the west coast, curb yer snow day envy and get your butt to work, why don’t you.

Hat tip to cousin Tannis for sharing the BBC gem Is Donald Trump now unstoppable? Comparing Trump and the rest of the Republican field to airline food, Bob Dole to a “wise old owl,” and Ted Cruz to a slippery fish, the piece leads with the most shade-throwing photo choice I’ve seen in a while. Come for the metaphors, stay for the bone-chilling truths and blunt international concern trolling.

And speaking of slippery fish, investors in startup cautionary tale Clinkle want their money back. Because they all threw their cash on a 20-something’s vanity pyre before ever seeing a demo and are now quite sad-face emoji at the fact it still doesn’t have a ‘product’ or ‘business model’ or ‘employees.'

Related: Judge John Hodgman calls out a tech worker for whining about a snack-hoarding colleague. From his response: "You are a grown-up, and it is time that you realize that there is something desperate and divorced-daddish about these companies trying to bribe you to spend more time at their cool pads with the free food and foosball.”

Also, if you read one thing today, please read Nellie Bowles’ take on Silicon Valley’s (next) impending doom at The Guardian, which of course includes a party, six people living in a two bedroom apartment, the "warm smell of bodies and pizza,” and “Venture Capitalist parking only.” See above on Clinkle, then slowly and calmly make your way to your popped-bubble fallout shelter.

Yours in circles of hell,
Amy