It's A Beautiful Day To Be Kind To Yourself.

Sweethearts! As we near the end of February, marching towards the one year anniversary of this pandemic, I hope everyone is doing what they can to take care of themselves. I’ve had numerous conversations with colleagues over the last few days about the oppressive burnout we’re feeling. Now, I know my colleagues and I are lucky to have our health and to have jobs, and lucky to have jobs that allow us to stay home (re: a story below, please give vaccines to everyone else before me. I AM FINE and angry with those skipping the line.) but it’s been tough. 

But folks are on edge, nerves are frayed. Whereas we were once all hyper-attuned to one another’s mental health when this all started happening, *this* is now normal, and the fact that we’re all expected to be fine and keep on chugging along is… exhausting. For me, my ability to focus has been severely compromised. I find myself needing to stand up and pace because words on the screen start swimming before my eyes, with no meaning. I re-read IMs three times. I forget emails I received the day before. I find pulling together cohesive thoughts longer than a paragraph daunting. Hell, I even get stressed thinking about how I have nothing witty or entertaining to say in this here Missive.

I don’t know the answer, I just know that I’m feeling it, and I imagine you are as well. I saw a tweet yesterday with someone asking if we could please normalize those who are “thriving” during the pandemic. And if that’s the case for you, I am so happy for you! But it’s not me, and it’s not many of the folks I talk to on a daily basis.

I think about how lonely I was living in New York, ironic because I was felt most isolated when packed in a subway car, crushed together with hundreds of silent strangers. The lack of eye contact got me every time - you could be shoulder-to-shoulder with a crowd, but no one would look you in the eye, acknowledge that you were there and indeed a human. Now, I’m sometimes on six hours of video calls a day, so at least I get to see the smiling faces of my colleagues, take some time to catch up on their weekends, learn that they’ve resurrected their baking habit, etc. But no real eye contact. I’ve been feeling that a lot lately.

So remember that it’s ok to be sad or anxious or worried right now. And even if everyone else is projecting normalcy, it’s impossible to know what’s actually in their hearts. You’ve got this, however you need to be.

And please wish my fabulous father Rob a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Here’s some internet for ya!

You’re lovely. Keep going.

xoxo Amy