"Lordy, I Hope There Are Tapes," and Other Mantras Tattooed to my Forehead

Between Comey’s #Sportsball testimony and the UK election, political nerds have ALL the tabs open this morning.

In the words of BuzzFeed, It Looks Like No One Has Won The UK General Election. WTF Happens Now? And as always, head on over to Vox’s The shocking UK election results, explained if you weren’t raised in a parliamentary democracy. Basically, Theresa May thought that calling a snap election would increase the Tory majority in the UK parliament, and uh well, nope, that didn’t happen yikes, awkward. The Conservatives lost twelve seats, bringing them under a majority government. For context, they’d previously hoped to gain 100 new seats. Woof. So now it looks like the Tories will be forming a minority government with the far-right, climate-change-denying, anti-abortion populist Democratic Unionist party (DUP.) Cool cool cool cool cool.

And over here in the colonies, nerds across the land huddled around their laptops and NPR apps in the gut-wrenching communal event to listen to a note-taking giant describe how the orange man scared him. That’s right, #ComeyDay!

It was riveting: Sen. Kamala Harris was at her cross-examining best, Sen. John McCain was disconcertingly incoherent, and Comey said that he’d "leaked his own memos in hopes of prompting the appointment of a special prosecutor.” And other than reading every humor piece Alexandra Petri writes on the subject - "Tell us again about your uncomfortable dinner with The Important Man, Mr. Comey” - you should also check out how the Onion’s A.V. Club marked up the error-riddled statement issued by Trump’s personal attorney.

And meanwhile, House Republicans voted to repeal Dodd-Frank provisions designed to protect American consumers after the 2008 financial crisis. In the worlds of the LA Times, "Its major changes include repealing the trading restrictions, known as the Volcker Rule, and scrapping the liquidation authority in favor of enhanced bankruptcy provisions designed to eliminate any chance taxpayers would be on the hook if a major financial firm collapsed.” COOL COOL COOL COOL COOL.

Well, at least I can drown my millennial sorrows in Rick and Morty bingewatching this weekend (ht Colin.)