Racist Dumbbells, Jails for Ladies, Elephants on Ambien.

It’s Monday! And it’s the Monday before Election Day in the US! So I’m not stressed while obsessively checking the last minute polls and pretty much mainlining cold brew, oh no, not me!

But on a serious note—and Canadian subscribers, I know that you’re with me on this because we’d all really like the belligerent elephant to lay off its Ambien—I hope you vote tomorrow, or have voted already. And yes, I could tell you that voting is a great civic responsibility, a right that people have fought and died for, an opportunity for you to stand up and be counted. But really, voting is the magical golden ticket that allows you to complain as much as you damned well want to. Do you think I could write this thing every-ish morning if I didn’t vote? I mean, probably, but not with the smug already-voted-by-mail satisfaction I am high on right now. Which is a delicious thing!

Novelist Stephen King said that he’s tired of being confused with Rep. Steve King—oh he of white nationalist fanboy fame—calling him a “racist dumbbell” while doing so. And I now love that phrase oh so much.

And while we’re talking politics, can we all raise a glass to the tireless fact checkers across the country who are probably typing on blistered fingers trying to keep up with the noxious lies being emitted by this administration?

Because hey, did you know that America used to incarcerate sexually-active women for national security purposes? YUP: “the panic was such that girls and young women could be taken in simply for being outside without adult supervision,” and many were for being—or seeming—sexually active.

And finally, Vox wonders if the explosion of popularity of CBD, the non-intoxicating sister cannabinoid to THC and compound I credit with helping me transition off of hydromorphone quickly after I broke my leg, is a scam. YOU BACK OFF VOX, I NEED SOMETHING HAPPY AND GOOD IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW. Speaking of which, I may need a new tincture to get through tomorrow. I kid, I kid [scampers off to the Apothecarium…]

GO VOTE! And be kind to each other, WHILE VOTING.

Xoxo Amy