VC Parody Videos, Oily Caffeinated Beverages, and California Dystopias

Happiest of Fridays, party people! First off, I forgot to credit the illustrious Victoria Gutierrez yesterday for sending me the Cards Against Humanity stats. Thank you Victoria! And since I know we have a couple of beer drinkers subscribed to this newsletter, you should check out the company she advises, Noble Brewer, which connects home brewers with brewmasters, and includes a subscription of resulting libations.

Thank you friend of the newsletter Adam for sending along what it would look like if Cormac McCarthy wrote ‘Home Alone.’ Additionally, Adam helped me think of new names for this newsletter, and the resulting text chain was PURE GOLD (Hurts Cuz It's True won.)

The $1.1T funding bill is headed for a vote. Ezra Klein at Vox explains all of it well, including the impact on the deficit, who’s getting a tax cut, and what policy riders reveal about each party.

As we know, and I remind you of, the Bay Area isn’t all millionaire pre-teens and artisanal paper towels. As the population grows and the housing market eats its young, many find themselves displaced. Monica Potts at the New Republic tells the story of the other Silicon Valley; Dispossessed in the Land of Dreams.

Speaking of Golden State dystopias, security is ramping up at California theme parks, with Disneyland adding metal detectors to gates and banning and ceasing sales of toys guns. Additionally, individuals over 14 can no longer wear masks or anything that obscures their faces.

This year, I’m thankful that my benevolent employers didn’t require us to do a parody holiday video. Although, if anyone knows who shot and edited that First Round video, I’d love to shake their hand: it’s very, very well produced.

Supposedly, Bulletproof Coffee - a (surprisingly tasty) butter-and-oil blended coffee mixture - isn’t just a beverage any more. Like everything else consumed by the hoodie-clad tech set, it’s a “lifestyle” amongst 20-30something men, with planks, gratitude, and a whole lot of merch. Quartz investigates.

Hey podcast listeners - have you checked out Limetown? If you’re like me and saving up the new season of Serial to binge-listen in one week, Limetown is a good pallet cleanser. It’s a fictional Serial-like podcast, with an X Files foundation and enough jump scares to make your morning BART commute extra entertaining for those around you.

As always, you guys are magical. Have a great weekend!